Yes, We Did It!

A successful home visit at last!  No anguished phone calls back to the hospital, no emergency cards, no self-harm.  As far as I could tell, seemed like we all managed fine and we're all set for another visit tomorrow.   I'm as pleased as punch: it's a real milestone in Julie's recovery.

It proved harder to replace Julie's primary care worker than I thought.  I left it to the hospital to sort out the details with Julie herself, but as soon as they got her on their own, they persuaded her that she probably just needed to spend a bit more time with Genevieve "repairing the relationship".  Sure enough, when Joe went to see her at the hospital last night Julie was feeling as if she had been backed into something she did not want.  She wasn't interested in "repairing relationships" - she just wanted to get herself better.  She has been working with Genevieve for a long time but the therapeutic part of the relationship is not really working.  It's no mystery - therapeutic relationships the world over are dogged by difficulty understanding one another, and it's normal to ask for a change if one doesn't work out.

It's a symptom of how "nice" Julie is, that she gave in so readily.  There were two adults, both senior members of staff, persuading her.  She worries about being a nuisence - it was so much easier to agree with them and say, yes, she would try to work it out.  It was only when she felt on safe ground that she felt she could admit what she really wanted.

I can't blame the hospital - it is all much easier not to have to reorganize staff - but it shocked me that they didn't realise that they were pressurising her. They have cared for her for 9 months, and it was a member of their own staff who first pointed out how difficult Julie found it to speak up and say no.  She is prone to all sorts of beliefs that may seem a bit irrational to an adult, but make lots of sense when you remember how young she is, how ill and how vulnerable.   She is fifteen, there are two of them, they are both figures of authority on the ward (one, a consultant).  Remembering that these are the very same people who locked her up in the hospital for a weekend just a few weeks ago, can anyone blame her for deciding that the best policy was just to agree with them for the duration of the interview?


I phoned back again this morning - this is always a palaver because no one is ever available straight away to talk and noone ever seems to ring back as requested.  It is almost impossible to combine these phone calls with holding down a job.  Once I got through, I explained what had happened and what Julie really wanted.  They seemed happy enough to do what she wanted, though this time it seems I have to put the request in writing, setting out our reasons, so obviously it never was quite as simple as it seemed at first.  I duly wrote down the request: a masterpiece of diplomacy, if I say so myself.